The Lost Practice of Sabbath

Christians are pretty good about following the Ten Commandments….well, at least 9 out of the 10. Why is it that we get all jumpy about breaking 9 of them, but when it comes to us keeping the Sabbath, we take that as optional? Of course, we could get into a discussion and debate about the Law and whether we are still under the Law with the New Covenant that we have in Christ, but that’s sort of missing the point.

On Christmas day, my family started a new tradition of sorts: we sat around the house and didn’t do anything. Well, we did stuff, just nothing that would take us away from the house and if anything, things that would help us to grow together as a family and appreciate the reason that we were celebrating that day: Jesus Christ. It was one of the best days that we had as a family. There were no deadlines. There was no rush. There was peace (as much as you can have in a house with a 3 year old and a 1 year old).

I had the opportunity the other day to take a “Spiritual Renewal” day. Some friends of ours have a lake house which they graciously allowed me to use for the day. It’s about an hour away, not too far to go for a day. Considering the December schedule that I had, it was a much needed break from all of the busyness that had occupied my life for the last month or so. I spent the day resting in God. I read, I prayed, I spent time in devotion, and I appreciated the stillness of a lake in Virginia in the winter, when the activity is minimal. It even got up to about 60 degrees. It was a time for nourishing and recharging my soul.

That’s really what Sabbath is all about. The Hebrew word that we get Sabbath from is “Shabbat” which means “to cease or rest.” Do we really know what that word means? Do we know what it means to slow down? Do we know what it means to find rest, and if we do, where do we find that rest? Do we really know what it means to stop or cease everything and take a break? I know that I struggle with the idea mightily. I have a hard time shutting my brain off and just being.

The first part of Psalm 37:7 says, “Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him;” Jesus said in Matthew 11:28-30, “Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” King David wrote in Psalm 62:1, “My soul finds rest in God alone; my salvation comes from him.” Where are we seeking solace and rest? Have we really come to grips with the fact that we serve a God who desires to give us rest?

God is willing to give us rest; he desires to give us rest, problem is that we can't stop long enough to accept and enjoy it. That's one of the reasons why it was commanded to the ancient Israelites. They needed to stop, reflect, and remember. Most of the times that the Israelites got into trouble it was because they had forgotten what God had done for them. There's a troubling passage in Judges 2 where we read, "After that whole generation had been gathered to their fathers, another generation grew up, who knew neither the LORD nor what he had done for Israel. Then the Israelites did evil in the eyes of the LORD and served the Baals. They forsook the LORD, the God of their fathers, who had brought them out of Egypt. They followed and worshiped various gods of the peoples around them. They provoked the LORD to anger because they forsook him and served Baal and the Ashtoreths." In just one generation, they had forgotten what the Lord had done for them. And what was the result? They turned away from the Lord. I would venture to guess that the forgetting didn't just happen. Over that generation, they probably started slacking more and more with the taking Sabbath and remembering all that the Lord had done for them. And then, the generation rose up that had completely forgotten.

We need to stop and rest and in our resting, we need to remember. That's really what we do when we meditate on God's word and all that he has done for us: we remember. God has shown us a history of faithfulness to his people, yet we can't stop long enough to recount that history because we're too busy, there's too much going on, and we can't quiet things down enough to hear what he's trying to tell us. I’m reminded of the story in 1 Kings 19 when Elijah is waiting for the Lord to pass by. An earthquake, a might wind, and a fire all pass and the Lord is not present there. It is only when there is a soft and gentle whisper that Elijah knows that the Lord is speaking. The thing is, I don’t think that we let our lives get that quiet to really hear that soft and gentle of a whisper.

There’s a great scene in the movie “Ray” when Ray Charles (Jamie Foxx) is having lunch with a woman and he hears a hummingbird’s wings fluttering outside the window. He tells the woman that the bird is there, but she can’t hear it. He says, “You have to listen” and so she focuses her attention on just that, and she can hear it when she blocks everything else out. That’s usually the time when God speaks to us, when we block everything else out. He’s not going to yell, so we’d better start listening.

We need to come back to the lost art and practice of Sabbath. We need to find rest in the Lord and we need to get away from all of our busyness and chaos. It will be good for our souls when we do. We’ll notice a difference, and hopefully, the people around us will as well.

May God give you opportunities to rest in him, and him alone. May you find peace and comfort in the stillness and silence that happen only when you stop and take part in Sabbath.

God In Tragedy

In his letter to the church in Corinth, the Apostle Paul wrote, “For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.” (1 Corinthians 1:18). The Gospel of Jesus Christ is offensive enough to people who don’t believe it. The claims that Christians make regarding Jesus Christ as the only way to salvation will offend some people. Some people think that the claims are just foolish. Some people just won’t care. To those of us who believe in the salvation that alone comes from Jesus Christ, it is the power of God. But the Gospel does not need any help in being offensive.

Recently, Pat Robertson made some unintelligent remarks regarding the tragic earthquake in Haiti. At some point, his P.R. people are going to realize that he is a liability and politely ask him to retire. In the mean time, there are people who are asking him to retire in a not so polite way, both Christian and non-Christian alike. The problem with remarks such as Robertson has recently made is that because he ascribes to a certain viewpoint and belief system, he ends up “becoming” a spokesman for all of the other people who hold that same viewpoint or belief system, regardless of whether or not they agree with his comments.

My first thought after watching the news after the Haiti earthquake was, “Come on! Doesn’t this country have enough problems?” Then when I heard that Pat Robertson had opened up his mouth to allow for his unintelligent musings to pour forth, I thought, “Come on! Don’t Christians have enough problems?” As I listened to the voice of the media and the public reacting to his comments, I did my best to keep quiet. The only thing that I had said was in the form of my Tweet/Facebook status which read, “God’s judgment on Christians is that Pat Robertson is still alive!” After a few more days to process the comments and really search Scripture, there are a few things I feel the need to say.

In Isaiah 40, the prophet speaks words of comfort to the people of God. The most famous portion of this chapter is the quote, “but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint.” But a little earlier in the chapter, Isaiah poses a few questions, “Who has understood the mind of the LORD, or instructed him as his counselor? Whom did the LORD consult to enlighten him, and who taught him the right way? Who was it that taught him knowledge or showed him the path of understanding?”

It’s in our nature as human beings to want answers, especially when tragedy strikes. But sometimes, we won’t have answers and the only thing that we can do is reach out in love to the ones who are desperately seeking those answers. If we don’t have answers, we shouldn’t create them or make them up. What’s redemptive about that? We shouldn’t presume that we understand the mind of God better than every other human being around us, that’s Gnosticism. We shouldn’t put words in God’s mouth and presume that we have the prophetic gift. In fact, prophecy is more about telling what God will do rather than interpreting what God did.

While I make no apologies for the offensiveness of the Gospel, I do make apologies for people who make it more offensive than God ever intended. It has been incredible to turn on the TV or look on the internet and to see the amount of aid and support that is being sent to the country of Haiti in the midst of this tragedy. To me, that is the correct response. I wonder if Pat Robertson sent any support to Haiti before he made his remarks or if he simply spoke the “mind of God” before he really had a chance to think about it.

Whether you are or are not a follower of Jesus Christ, I would hope and pray that you would not judge Jesus by the stupid things that his followers sometimes do and say. Know that Pat Robertson does not speak for everyone. In fact, I wonder if he really speaks for anyone other than himself and a handful of other sadly misdirected folks. In the immortal words of Buzz Lightyear, he is “a sad, strange, little man” and he has my pity! Can God work in this situation? Of course he can. Did he cause this situation? I don’t think so.

The Apostle Paul wrote in Romans 8:18-22, “I consider that our present sufferings are not worth comparing with the glory that will be revealed in us. The creation waits in eager expectation for the sons of God to be revealed. For the creation was subjected to frustration, not by its own choice, but by the will of the one who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be liberated from its bondage to decay and brought into the glorious freedom of the children of God. We know that the whole creation has been groaning as in the pains of childbirth right up to the present time.” We live in a fallen world where tragedy strikes, not because God willed it, but because the world is fallen. The sin of Adam and Eve have subjected ALL of creation to frustration. We are fallen people in need of a savior because we can’t save ourselves and we live in a fallen world that needs redemption as much as we do.

God can use any means necessary to speak to his people. The Old and New Testaments are full of ways that God has gotten the attention of his people. While God has spoken through an ass before (Numbers 22), I don’t think that this is a case of history repeating itself!

It's Christmas, but Easter's comin'!

When I get a break from school between quarters, you would think that I would let my brain rest a little bit. The problem is, my “Books To Read” pile continually grows throughout the year. Unfortunately, I am unable to read books for leisure as fast as I would like to and end up trying to furiously ingest as many as possible in the few free moments that I have between one quarter’s end and the beginning of the next.

I am close to completing my second book in the last few weeks. The book is titled “Christless Christianity” by Michael Horton. I have listened to Horton’s radio show, the White Horse Inn on several occasions and have accrued about 3 or 4 of his book, none of which I have ever read. As a professor at Westminster Seminary California, Horton falls into the Reformed school of thought.

It’s hard to say what I would classify myself as when it comes to theology and all of the other –ologies that relate to the church. If you would look at my bookshelf, you would see the classics, like C.S. Lewis, Bonhoeffer, Schaeffer, and others. You would also see some of the Emerging types like McLaren, Pagitt, and Bell. Just to completely confuse people, I have some John MacArthur as well. I have never been one to believe that I need to agree with every word that someone writes to learn something from them.

Anyway, back to Horton. Horton takes on the likes of the prosperity gospel preachers (Robert Schuller, Joel Osteen, et.al.) and also the Emerging church (McLaren, Pagitt, et.al). He does it tastefully and with purpose. The book is not a “bashing” for the sake of bashing, but is an analysis of what Horton and others have observed happening within the church in the West. We have become very good at seeing the church as the source of positive information that isn’t so positive in comparison to the Gospel of Jesus Christ.

Having just celebrated Advent and Christmas, and having also preached a sermon on Simeon from Luke 2, this is something that resonates with me. Even if we stop during the Christmas season to celebrate and remember that “Jesus is the reason for the season” (sorry, but I hate that phrase….though I understand the premise), we still seem to forget the reason why Jesus came.

We can be pretty quick to point out the Jesus came so that we might have eternal life, but that’s really just one of the benefits. The real reason that he came was because we were incapable of saving ourselves. Somehow or another, this message has been lost in the church. We seem to think that following Jesus and his example is enough to save us when in reality, it is only his grace that can do that. We are sinners, each and every one of us. We can’t save ourselves. I would venture to say that we can’t even really do anything good except for the fact that we are made in the image of God and it is that image that shines through, whether we consider ourselves followers of Christ or not.

Horton is pretty clear that a move away from a Christianity of “creeds” and a move toward a Christianity of “deeds” ends up looking more like self-salvation than it does “being the church.” Here’s one of the cases where there is a tension to me, and it seems to be one of the tensions that Horton himself sees. This is the difference between how the Apostle Paul explains things and the way that James, the brother of Jesus, explains things. Paul says that we are not saved by works, lest anyone should boast. James says that we need to show our faith through action: grace evokes deeds. So which one is right?

Yes. That’s the answer. They both are. Here’s the tension, we need to be constantly reminded of the fact that we don’t perform deeds in order that we be saved. Instead, we perform deeds BECAUSE we have been saved and are continually being saved. I have never liked the idea that “I was saved” because it seems like such an event that is final. I know myself and the fact that reformation, sanctification, justification, and all of those other fancy theological terms don’t happen to me in the blink of an eye. I am dying to myself daily and sometimes, my old self has a resurrection of sorts. It’s three steps forward, two steps back.

Horton is encouraging (maybe pleading with) us to not forget our creeds. We need to remember that strategies, purpose statements, and other well-meaning innovations do not save us. We are saved only through what Christ did that we were unable to do on our own. When we read the Bible as a sort of horoscope for the day rather than a story of grace, forgiveness, and redemption, we misuse the Bible. When we fail to realize that the Bible is God’s revelation of himself to us and instead see it as seven easy steps to be a better person, we miss the point.

I haven’t finished Horton’s book, but I can guess how it ends. We, the church, need to be “missional” as we go about making disciples of all nations, but we also need to remember the grace that we have received. We can’t stop living that grace and preaching that grace. We can’t start thinking that the salvation that comes from Christ is something that we’re worthy of or deserve. The moment we do that is the moment that we no longer need Christ in our Christianity. The moment that we do that is when Christ’s purpose for coming to the earth, dying the way that he did, and resurrecting the way that he did, is unnecessary.

While I could die on a cross (though I don't expect that I would go silently), I wouldn’t expect that I would be resurrecting any time soon thereafter. Christ came and lived a perfect life and took on my sin. Whereas sin entered the world through one man, the one man, Jesus, came into the world that salvation might enter the world through one man as well.

Around Easter time, there’s a saying that has become popular in the church: it’s Friday, but Sunday’s comin’. Around Christmas time, I think that we need to remember: it’s Christmas, but Easter’s comin’! As much as we celebrate the birth of the baby Jesus, he didn’t stay there (sorry, Will Ferrell! He’s not still wearing his golden fleece diapers!). Christ came to fulfill the purpose that his Father had for him in becoming the atonement for sin. That’s something that I could never do on my own.

Thank God for Christmas, but thank him even more for Easter! It’s Christmas, but Easter’s comin’!

Out of the Ashes

During my time in Asheville, NC, God began to turn my world upside down as far as all of the preconceived notions that I had regarding the church, theology, and spirituality. My very formulaic approach towards spirituality was nice if you wanted to put on a show for everybody, but if you really wanted to get down to it and be a follower of Christ, formulas didn’t get you very far. Another irony through the personal growth was that I connected with a guy who helped me along in the journey, offering some pretty radical advice and pushing me to ask the questions that had already been welling up within me. The irony of it wasn’t who he was, it was the fact that the person who had suggested I get in touch with him would have strongly reconsidered had he known what the outcome would be.

When I started seminary, I wasn’t really scared of being pushed to the edge of reason in my faith because of what I had been through up to that point. I had already been wrestling with some questions, not so much about theology, but about methodology. That’s where I really struggled and still continue to struggle. When I left Asheville, I had been accused of not being honest about my denominational allegiance. My response was a question, “Are you referring to theological or methodological?” The question was met with silence, so I continued, “Because if you mean methodological, then you’re absolutely right. But if you meant theological, then I challenge you to point out where my theology differs from yours.” Again, I was met with silence. Needless to say, I learned an awful lot through the experience. But like I said, I was asking some serious questions about the methodology of this thing that we call church. In fancy theological terms, you could say that my ecclesiology was being stretched and reformed.

My seminary program is different from the traditional program as it is not in residence and I have the opportunity to interact with others who are in ministry throughout the states, and in some cases, the world. God led me to some others who were wrestling through some of the very same questions that I was wrestling with. All of a sudden, we could wrestle together, safely, without being labeled heretics or liberals. We could ask questions that we might normally be afraid to ask in our ministry settings.

I can honestly say that I don’t have that fear where God has me right now. He has blessed me with some brothers and mentors who are willing to ask the same tough questions about why we do what we do as I have been asking. But I know that there are probably those who are in churches that don’t feel that way. They don’t feel that they can question some of the rigid methodologies that have been tested and found “tried and true.”

Now, please understand, I am not talking about a reinterpretation of theology or even an expansion of it. I am not suggesting anything other than a shift in how we do things. As I look over the landscape of Western churches, I struggle with what I see. The church, when it first began, was a counter-cultural movement, it did not take its cues from culture, but rather it took its cues from Scripture. The idea of contextualization has been utilized in missions since the beginning. Paul did it, Peter did it, others did it, so it’s not new. The question is, how much of what we see in culture do we use in the church and how much do we say, “No more?”

The Western church has not been through a significant amount of hardship. You can sort of see that by some of the reactions that Christians have when their religious freedoms are threatened. The funny thing is, in the places where they have no religious freedoms, the church is thriving more than it is here in the West. Through struggle, through abuse, through trial and tribulation, the church rises up. It reminds me of the mythical Phoenix. The phoenix gets to the end of its life and it burns up and out of the ashes comes new life.

I wonder if that’s what needs to happen with the Western church. Do we need to be brought into the fire and burned up? Do we need to rise from the ashes, better than we were before? I think that we need to consider what that could mean. Through the fire, the dross is burned off and we are left with something that is better, more beautiful. Could it be that we have missed the mark when it comes to our understanding of how we do church? If we have, what are we doing to rise from the ashes?

Live In the Now, Man!

I’ve not been a big fan of the fall since my early 20’s. Not really sure why, but it just seems to be a fairly bleak season for me. Since getting married and starting a family, it’s been hard to not embrace some aspect of the fall as all other members of my family are born within a 3 week period during the fall. So, my disdain for the fall doesn’t really sit well with the rest of my family.

Always one to try to better myself and figure out how I can improve, I pondered some deep thoughts during a drive the other day. I was trying to figure out why I have this tendency to get so down in the fall. As I began to inwardly reflect, I made two observations about myself: 1) I have a tendency to always have a 5-year plan and 2) my 5-year plan takes my focus off of the “hear and now.” I know that it doesn’t sound like much, but it was pretty ground-breaking for me. I mean, who doesn’t want to plan for the future? Who doesn’t want to have a map of how things will play out in the next 5 years? Who doesn’t want that sense of security (albeit false)?

As I continued to reflect, I thought about the two extreme scenarios that I could find myself in. The first scenario is reflecting so much on the future that I completely neglect the present (which is sort of what I feel like I do sometimes). The other scenario is the complete engrossment in the moment that there is an almost irresponsible approach to the future: no plans, just go with the flow. Neither scenario really seems viable to me. My reflection led me to think of Jesus and his short 33 years of life on the earth.

If ever there was someone who had the potential of being focused on a future event, it was Jesus. Theologians differ on their opinion of whether or not Jesus truly knew his future and fate. The ones who question it base it on the fact that in order to become human, he needed to forego some of his divine attributes (i.e., omnipresence – Jesus could not be in two places at once). Regardless of that, he was pretty aware of what was going on considering that he specifically instructed people who he had healed to not speak of what had happened to anyone for fear of his death coming prematurely. But Jesus took advantage of every moment, every opportunity, every meeting that he had. He didn’t waste a minute. The most amazing thing about it is that while focusing on the moment, he never lost sight of his purpose and his mission: he still had his eyes on the future.

That focus on his mission also helped him to not be caught up in the moment. His perfection allowed him to not get bogged down in some of the things that you and I might find ourselves tempted by. He did things with purpose, he never did things to get attention first, that might have been a result, but it was never the main purpose.

It would be easy for me to say, “But he’s Jesus!” and that’s a pretty fair assessment. I’m not perfect, nor have I ever claimed to be. But, am I not to strive for perfection and Christ-likeness? What is my main mission and purpose in life? To glorify God and enjoy him forever. Everything that I do needs to be focused on that. Problem is, I live in a culture that is telling me that it’s all about me, that I need to know my future, that I need to plan it out accordingly because the future is really “in my hands.” Jesus said in Matthew 6, “And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?'”

Again, there’s a fine line that we walk here between faith and responsibility, especially when we have families. But, if we look at a good portion of the world, I don’t think they’ve got their portfolios in order or their 401Ks all maxed out. In fact, some of them are barely making it through the day. They didn’t know how they were going to eat today, but somehow they made it. They’ll go to sleep, maybe lulled to sleep by the moans of their starving kids, and deal with tomorrow’s problems when…and if…they awake.

Yeah, it’s bleak. I told you, I don’t like the fall. But seriously, can we put things in perspective and realize that when we go about our lives in a purposeful and intentional way, living in the moment, we have the potential for having a huge impact for the future. If we get bogged down with our 5-year plans, we’ll miss a ton of opportunities that God throws our way, and we won’t ever get them back again.

May we learn from the one who taught us to keep our eye on the purpose while embracing every moment. May we, in the words of Thoreau, “live deep and suck out all the marrow of life”, allowing ourselves to be used by the one who knows what the future holds…and has the perfect 5-year plan all figured out.

Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.“

How Are You Following?

Jesus went up on a mountainside and called to him those he wanted, and they came to him. He appointed twelve—designating them apostles—that they might be with him and that he might send them out to preach and to have authority to drive out demons. These are the twelve he appointed: Simon (to whom he gave the name Peter James son of Zebedee and his brother John (to them he gave the name Boanerges, which means Sons of Thunder); Andrew, Philip, Bartholomew, Matthew, Thomas, James son of Alphaeus, Thaddaeus, Simon the Zealot and Judas Iscariot, who betrayed him. (Mark 3:13-19)

Have you ever read a passage for the 100th time and caught something that you never saw before? That’s the beauty of Scripture, it is living and breathing and continually penetrates into our very core to transform us to be more Christlike.

I was reading this passage the other day and a phrase that is probably mostly overlooked stood out to me: that they might be with him. As I continue on in my own spiritual formation, I realize that God is not sitting there with a checklist of what I am accomplishing to be a better disciple of Christ. Instead, he is asking for total commitment and for time. When he called the first apostles, the plan was for them to spend as much time with Jesus as possible in order that they might be trained by him and grow in their relationship with the Father, through the Son.

Somewhere along the way, we got the idea that we were supposed to be bound to the Law, the very Law that Paul tells us we are no longer bound to. Although we have been saved by grace through faith, we continually try to come up with ways that we can earn our salvation. It is hard to accept grace. It is hard to think that someone would give us such a gift just because he loves us. So, we make every effort to feel like we are “earning” it.

God requires total commitment on our part, how are we doing with that? I know that I fall short. Things can push that time out of the way. I can begin to become very pharisaical and make every effort to “earn” my salvation. The Father is calling us to spend time with him that we might become more like his Son every day. That time does not always need to be filled with “stuff.” God speaks to us through his inspired Word and he speaks to us when we pray, but the Bible has stories of God’s speaking in the midst of silence. The best relationships are ones where neither party feels the need to fill the air with useless babble or meaningless conversation, sometimes more can be said in silence than with words.

So, how are you following the Master? Are you walking close, carrying your list, and checking things off as you go. Or are you content to stand in his presence, allowing him to transform you in whatever way he sees fit?

Submission, Part II

That dirty word “submission” really gets a bad rap. I remember hearing messages from Ephesians 5 where Paul tells wives to “submit to their husbands” because the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church. It’s funny, I remember hearing messages about that first part of the passage, but I don’t remember hearing the charge to husbands in the next passage. Maybe I wasn’t listening too hard. Maybe I zoned out. Regardless of what happened, it wasn’t until years after hearing some of these messages that I really looked at the rest of the passage.

I had heard complaints about this passage from mostly women. Looking back on it, I have to say that their complaints were justified. If you don’t take into account what Paul says after this, then you only see a portion of his definition and ideal for submission. After Paul writes about wives submitting to their husbands, look at what he says to the husbands:

Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.

I really think that the reason that this passage evokes such strong negative responses is because of the lack of emphasis on Paul’s emphasis. There are 12 verses in this passage, 3 directed towards wives, and 9 directed towards husbands. Why has there been more of an emphasis on 25% of this passage without a stronger emphasis on the other 75%?

I can only speculate here, but I would venture to guess that it would be much easier for a woman to submit to her husband if she truly feels loved and valued by him. If she feels that he would give anything for her, wouldn’t she feel the same way in return? The husband’s responsibility is being compared to Christ’s love for the church. Christ gave himself up for the church in order that she might be made holy and blameless. Wives are to be top priority to their husbands.

Now, I slowly begin to slump down in my chair as I read through this passage. I realize how far short I fall when loving my wife the way that Christ loved the church. I realize that I have not taken my directive from the Lord as serious as I should. It becomes even more of a conviction as I realize that I have two little boys who will watch me and base their love for their future wives on what they see Daddy doing.

In my 8 years of marriage, I have never played the “I’m your husband so submit to me” card with my wife. I pray that in the next 50+ years of my marriage that I never will. If I am doing what I am supposed to be doing, I won’t even have to ask, it will be a natural progression. Submission is a two-way street and if it’s only one-way, then it’s not really submission. Husbands, we can redefine submission when we truly live out Paul’s words to us: to love our wives as Jesus loved (and loves) the church. When we start doing that, I think we will begin to see that mutuality of this word that has been abused and misused.

Husbands, may God give us strength and wisdom to know how to sacrifice ourselves for the wives that God has blessed us with, and that he uses to make us better servants of Him.