Ch-ch-ch-ch-changes!!

“What is the greatest motivating factor in your life to change? When a difficult, adaptive change manifests itself in your life as a necessity, what helps you muster up the courage to "go with it" and allow yourself to be transformed?”

This was my status update for today, March 10, 2011, at 10:24 AM. I will anxiously wait to see the responses that might come through because I am genuinely interested in what makes people face change with more strength and courage. I could probably make some guesses, but I think that I will wait and do a follow-up on this.

Few people that I know or have encountered are “change junkies.” I know at least one in my life, probably two, but they are the exception rather than the rule. People genuinely do not like change, and if they do, it’s probably because the change most likely has little impact on them and their own personal preferences. Change is hard, disruptive, uncomfortable, and, at times, very painful.

Based on the assessment of my strengths through the Strength Finders test and a further refining look at those through a process called Core Clarity, people with my top five strengths can be classified as “stabilizers.” The funny thing is, sometimes that stabilization manifests itself as de-stabilization. In other words, if in order to get to the end goal it becomes necessary to disrupt things in order to bring about a more stable system, I’m all in.

Those who know me deeply are laughing right now because of the truth of that statement. If you meet me and have any length of conversation with me, you would most likely feel that you get a pretty good snapshot within the first few times of talking with me. What you see is what you get; I am a New Englander by upbringing and a New Yorker by birth. The combination of the two of those together would make some people utter some words that I will refrain from typing.

Jesus was a change agent. He came to the world because a change was necessary. Based on what Paul writes in Romans, and also the whole of Scripture, we know that things are broken and they need to be fixed. Sin has turned our world upside down and God made a way for that to happen. Jesus was and is the solution to the sin problem. While I won’t go so far as to call Jesus a change junkie, it was definitely his bottom line. I would go a step further and say that it was transformation, which might simply be defined as change with purpose and direction.

It follows then that those people who would consider themselves followers of Jesus need to ask themselves some very important questions, like, “do we really understand who Jesus is and what he came for?” If you go into a majority of churches today and listen to the murmurs that lie just beneath the surface, I would think that you would agree with me that the message that some have interpreted as Jesus’ message is a far cry from the radical message that we have documented in the Gospels. We have made the message about us and our own preferences rather than about our Father’s business. We have decided that it’s fine and good to say that Jesus came to seek and save that which was lost, as long as he takes care of me first. We have abducted a message that is about love, repentance, forgiveness, and transformation and made it a self-centered psychological “I’m OK, who gives a #$^& if you’re OK” message.

The sad part of it is that if you listened to the sermons that are being preached in these same churches, you would be hard-pressed to believe that they were the same church. It’s not that the message that is coming from the pulpits is false, it’s that there is a disconnect in how people are hearing that message. Somehow, people’s lenses and filters for hearing this message are distorted, and I have an idea how to take that distortion away: true discipleship.

I’m going to leave it there and see what kinds of response come to me on Facebook. This is some serious stuff to “chew on” and process, even for me. Are you willing to take a long, hard look at everything that you thought was true and have it de-stabilized? What if the end result was more amazing and fulfilling than anything that you could even dream or imagine? Think about it.

Carpe Diem

I find that it's pretty easy to get into a routine of streamlined days. What I mean by that is, it can get really simple to wake up, go through the motions of the day, and then find myself back at my bed, wondering what in the world I actually accomplished in the day. Having held jobs using opposite sides of my brain in the years since I graduated from college, I can find myself at odds with myself in settling into a groove. The analytical and structured side of me wants order and form while the artsy/creative side of me wants to rebel against the very idea. If I'm not careful, I can find myself standing still.

I heard a great sermon this morning from Acts 8:26-40 about Philip and his encounter of an Ethiopian official who was on the side of the road reading the Scriptures. The Holy Spirit had spoken to Philip and told him to go along the very road where he met this Ethiopian. The general idea of the message was that in order to maximize our presence and have an impact on the people around us, we need to be faithful, attentive, focused, and ready..

At my best, I sometimes feel that I have half of those things covered, but hardly all four. Ironically, I received a gift within the past six months from someone who claims that the fruit of the spirit that I readily exercise is faithfulness. So, I feel like I've got that part covered. I would also say that 85% of the time I feel ready and expectant of what might be coming my way. I have learned to anticipate things in my life and while I still encounter surprises, I am still ready for them, if that makes any sense.

So, the remaining two things are attentiveness and focus. I would love to meet someone who never struggles with these. As our culture gets more saturated with "stuff" and as we become increasingly more visual, I think that it gets harder and harder to maintain focus. I have often found myself multi-tasking to such a degree that I wonder what is being accomplished: reading a book while watching TV with the sound muted and listening to music, all the while keeping a window open on the computer to check in on Facebook or CNN. Attentiveness and focus are difficult for me.

There are two things that I have been doing to make strides in these areas. The first thing is a consistent morning time block spent in God's Word and other devotional material. If there is anything that can help us focus better than God's Word, I'm not sure what it is. The psalmist wrote in Psalm 119:105, "Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path." While we will rarely get specifics, God will give us direction through His word that can give us clear insight to be attentive and focused.

The other thing that is helping me to make strides in this area is accountability with trusted people. It seems like it becomes increasingly more difficult to hear truth from people. Everyone's trying to candycoat reality rather than give a clear picture of what's going on. I was amused this past week when American Idol fans were posting on Facebook their approval of the new judges and the absence of Simon. The thing is though, Simon spoke truth into people's lives who desperately needed to hear it. While I would hardly hold him up as the accountability partner that I am looking for, he hit the nail on the head so often with people whose own family and friends had been feeding them a line of crap that they could actually sing. But I digress.

It's easy to stay inattentive and focused when no one's asking me which direction I'm headed. When I know that I will have to answer certain questions though, it keeps me aligned and focused.

Back to Philip. He followed what the Spirit was telling him and ended up engaged in conversation with a powerful man who he was not only able to answer some deep spiritual questions for, but was also able to baptize and help get started in his journey of faith. How awesome is that? What would have happened if Philip hadn't paid attention and if he had said, find someone else other than me? Someone else would have gotten the blessing that he did.

I'm convinced that we miss opportunities all the time. Fear ends up driving our decision-making process and I think that we chicken out a lot. Our pastor used the "carpe diem" clip from "Dead Poets Society" this morning to illustrate his point. Are we taking advantage of what comes our way or are we remaining unfocused and inattentive? I would hate to stand before God while looking at a large pile of missed opportunities that I might have taken advantage of if I had only been focused and attentive.

Pay attention. Be astonished. Tell about it. Mary Oliver's simple words are words to live by. May we hold them close to our hearts that we might not miss opportunities that come our way.

Continuing In Between

Three weeks ago, I posted a blog entitled "In Between Days" about those times in our life when we find ourselves in transition. I am a fairly avid reader and have been blessed to live within close proximity to a place called Ollie's. Their motto is "Good stuff cheap!" They also have a healthy selection of "Inspirational" books. I have been fortunate to have found many books, both required and supplemental, that I have used for my seminary coursework. As an avid reader though, I have the same problem at a place like Ollie's that people with weight issues have at the all-you-can-eat buffet. I find myself loading up more than I can process or go through.

I made a trip this week to Ollie's in search of a book that I am preparing to lead a group through. While I had that specific book on my radar, I was still open to other books that might present themselves to me. In my perusal, I came across a book called "The Land Between." The title and cover caught my eye enough to have me pick it up and examine it further. The subtitle of the book is "Finding God in Difficult Transitions" and that really sparked my interest. I have been in the process of walking with some people through some major life transitions and I am always seeking wisdom in how I can best encourage them. So, I picked up the book.

I'm not one to recommend books which I haven't read before, though I have done it on occasion. I knew, though, that the person to whom I was going to recommend this book would probably not look favorably on it had I not read it myself before recommending it to them, so I dove into it yesterday. I finished it today.

The one word that I would use to describe Jeff Manion, the pastor and author who penned this book, is humble. I don't think he ever mentions the exact size of his church, something that pastors have a tendency to do in a similar way to men comparing any number of various conditions or conquests. His 25 years in the same church gives him incredible clout in my book having a father who retired after 36 years in the same church. Manion never comes across as a "know-it-all" or attempts to belittle, his writing style is very conversational, winsome, engaging, and disarming.

Manion uses the story of the Israelites as they journeyed through the wilderness as a comparison to those who find themselves in difficult transitions in life. He interjects personal stories, both his own as well as of people whom he knows. Ultimately, he points out that there is hope. Regardless of what our situations may look like, regardless of our feelings in the midst of them, if we trust and put our faith in God, he will truly make all things work together for good. There is no guarantee that it will happen on this side of eternity, but it will happen.

After finishing the book, I was so antsy I wanted to run to Ollie's to see if I could find a few more copies to give to 2 special people in my life. I will settle for loaning out my copy for now. My prayer is that the truth of God's word will strike them in the same way that it struck me, or even more powerfully.

Transition is such a funny word to me. I was led to my former church because it was a church "in transition." A pastor friend of mine wrote books on having "transitioned" churches. Generally, transition and change can easily be placed in people's "4 letter words" category. The reality is that life is full of transition. If we're not encountering some level of transition, we're probably doing something wrong. As I surveyed my life, I found that I am no exception to the rule. The transitions that I am or have experienced may not be as significant as other people's, but every transition feels extreme when you are in the thick of it.

My church recently finished a series called "Reset" where we talked about waking up, paying attention, and telling about what God has done in our lives. We're jumping into a series called "Maximum Impact" tomorrow. As we all try to slow our lives down and find more breathing time in the spaces, it's so important not to fill in the space with more stuff. When we make space in our lives, we will only help ourselves when we encounter the inevitable transitions.

If you have a couple of hours, pick up a copy of "The Land Between." It might not impact you in the same way that it did me, but the story of God's people and their transitions can be encouraging to anyone, regardless of what they are in the midst of. If you're facing major transition, may God be your guide in the midst of it. May he shower you with grace, peace, and mercy as you listen for a familiar voice in unfamiliar territory. If we seek after his face, he will lead us home. It may not be in our time or even in our way, but it will be the best possible timing and the best possible way.

Barberland

The majority of my adult life I have been a moviephile. I love watching movies and engaging in their story. I especially love it when movies explore issues of spirituality and challenge me in my thinking. As I have grown older, and hopefully more mature, I have begun to appreciate documentaries more as well. I am assuming that around the time that the switch gets clicked where parents begin to look smart is around the same time that documentaries begin to offer some appeal.

After finishing some of my schoolwork for this week and next, I watched a documentary called “Barberland” about the barber profession. In my lifetime, I have known two barbers personally. One was the father of an elementary school friend and the other was a church member in my former church. Thinking back on them both now, they seemed to have been cut from the same mold: both gentle, kind, warm, compassionate, and easy to talk to.

The film was fascinating as it highlighted barbers in the United States from coast to coast. Interestingly enough, a number of the barbers were from San Francisco. Not sure what it is about San Francisco, but their barbers were not afraid to talk on camera. Many of them told their stories, how they came to become barbers, what they liked about the profession, whether or not they would ever retire, and various other things. The turning point for many of them in the barbering world was when the Beatles came on the scene in the 60’s. From that point forward, they needed to adapt to a changing society. Flat tops and crew cuts became passé and “Beatles cuts” became standard.

The barbers talked about how they loved what they did, they loved their customers, and they didn’t feel that they were simply customers, but family as well. They see their jobs as low-stress. A number of them highlighted a statistic that said that among professions with the longest life spans, barbering was among the highest. They love what they do and as someone once told me, “Find a job that you love and you’ll never work a day in your life.”

Towards the end of the film, many of the barbers expressed their opinion that barbering is a dying profession. They encounter barbers in their 40’s and 50’s and older, but there are no barbers in their 20’s and 30’s. As I heard that statistic, I wondered to myself whether or not any of them had seen the movie “Barbershop” or “Barbershop 2” with Ice Cube and Cedric the Entertainer. While they are fictitious movies, the majority of the barbers portrayed within the film were in their 20’s and 30’s.

It seems that barbering is headed in the direction that so many things go in our fast-paced society. It may be destined for distinction. That concept keeps emerging in my life lately as I look around. After spending some time on the phone speaking with someone in a similar predicament, I recalled “The Shawshank Redemption” and the character of Brooks. Here was a man who had been behind bars the majority of his adult life and when he was finally released from prison, the world outside the bars had not stopped. He was ill-prepared to meet that world and was unable to face it and cope.

Change is hard. While I do know some “change junkies” in my life, they are the exception more than the rule. More often I encounter people who loathe change and while they may not say it this succinctly, they fear it. The world changes and they want nothing more than to find stability somewhere. Ironically, this attitude continues within the Church as well. I say ironically, because as followers of Jesus, change is who we are.

Transformation has become a buzz word within the Church. We are called to be transformed by the Apostle Paul in Romans 12:1-2. Many books on preaching emphasize that preaching can be informative or transformative.

Jesus was all about the “new.” He came to make all things new. In Luke 5, Jesus speaks these words in verses 36-39, “He told them this parable: “No one tears a piece out of a new garment to patch an old one. Otherwise, they will have torn the new garment, and the patch from the new will not match the old. And no one pours new wine into old wineskins. Otherwise, the new wine will burst the skins; the wine will run out and the wineskins will be ruined. No, new wine must be poured into new wineskins. And no one after drinking old wine wants the new, for they say, ‘The old is better.’” This passage is sandwiched in Luke between accounts of Jesus challenging the “norm” of the day. All of the laws that had been held to were being challenged. Jesus was changing everything.

And that’s how it should be when we encounter him too, everything should change. We are no longer the same, everything is different. I’m reminded of a song by Jason Gray called “I Am New” of which the lyrics of the chorus are, “I am not who I was, I am being remade, I am new. I am chosen and holy and I’m dearly loved, I am new.” Jesus came to make all things new, that includes us.

So, the question is, will we be open to the transformation? Will we be destined for distinction because of a refusal to change or will we be open to the change that God has to do in us?

In Between Days

I was listening to the Cure the other day, and my brain was sparked by hearing their song "In Between Days." I feel like I am always between things, coming and going, never ceasing or resting. Right now I am between school quarters, gearing myself up to start into another quarter within the next 10 days. Until the other day, I was between Christmas and New Year’s, and we have traveled many miles in the past 5 days on our way to visit family.

When I find myself “in between” it seems that I always want to be here or there. I find it hard to exist in the in between. I feel unsettled and unresolved, waiting to move backward or forward. At the same time, this tension of the “in between” is something that I feel like I am being forced to embrace. The reality of life is that we are always somewhere in between. We find ourselves to be students and teachers, givers and receivers, children and parents, beginners and experts.

Considering that those transitional and in between states are where we spend most of our lives, should we not embrace them? Instead of quickly wanting to rush to the next thing, should we really stop and embrace the process? After all, growth happens through process, not through an instantaneous happening.

I am reminded in the midst of these “in between” days that I am between worlds as well. I long for my eternal home and yet need to find solace where I am. I am an exile, one who is without a home and I need to heed the words of Jeremiah to the exiles from Israel to “seek the peace and prosperity” of the place where I am planted at this moment.

Worrying over my “in between” state will not get me out of it any faster. Ignoring what is happening around me will do more damage than good. So, I find myself having to embrace the “in between.” I need to keep my eyes fixed on things in front of me and yet live in the moment, realizing that yesterday was the day before’s tomorrow, and today was yesterday’s tomorrow. When tomorrow comes, it will be today, and the days will continue to pass. Do I lament the passing of those days or do I embrace them as they come, regardless of whether I feel “in between” or not.

Paul wrote in Galatians 6:9, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” If we persist, we will reap a harvest for what we are doing. If we do not give up, we will see the rewards of our labor.

Rather than going into the New Year making resolutions that I will never keep, I would much rather move into each new day with the expectation that I will make the most of it, whether I’m “in between” or not. May you find rest and solace in today and seek out the peace and prosperity of wherever you are. May you realize that the work that God has begun in you has made a little bit more progress today and that it will continue to do so. May you seek to live your “in between days” without dwelling in the past or getting lost in the future.

A Broken Toy Christmas

One year, when my brother and I were probably about 11 and 7, respectively, we had been pretty terrible in the months leading up to Christmas. We were constantly fighting and getting at each other and my parents had constantly warned us that if we didn't stop, "Santa" would be bringing us nothing but broken, old toys for Christmas. As was usually the case, we assumed that our parents were kidding and that they would never even dream of withholding presents from us at Christmas. After all, everyone should get presents, right?

Well, Christmas morning approached and there was no improvement in our behavior. So, when we woke up on Christmas morning and went out to the Christmas tree, all that we found underneath was a pile of broken and old toys with a note that said something to the effect of, "You've been naughty, and here's what you get!"

Needless to say, we were devastated. Me being the younger of the two of us, I think that I was probably more so. I remember whining and crying and trying to convince my parents that this was unfair and unjust (trying to capitalize on the biblical notion of justice). Finally, after my parents had felt that their point had been sufficiently made, they went to a closet and pulled out all of the "real" presents. We were overjoyed with this gracious act, telling our parents that we knew all along that they would never do this to us, while secretly taking in a deep sigh of relief.

My parents just sent me a bunch of pictures from that Christmas and the one here shows my brother and me in our state of dismay and disbelief, me wiping the tears from my eyes. The funny thing is, I had just recounted the story to some people at our work Christmas party the week before. It has always stayed with me.

Now, parenting experts may call the exercise cruel and unjust, some people may think that it was harsh, and to be frank, I'm still not exactly sure how I feel about it. My leaning is towards the fact that my parents showed my brother and I an incredible amount of grace. What we deserved, based on our actions and behavior, was the broken toys. What they gave us were the presents that showed that despite our imperfections, they loved us.

I didn't have to go through years of counseling to get over this and yet I still remember the Christmas vividly. In a lot of ways, I can't help but connect what my parents did to what God did for us when he send Jesus to the world. The history of God's people is full of stubborn and obstinate people who thought that regardless of their behavior, a loving God would never turn his back on them and would never mete out justice on them. They were right, but someone still had to pay the price. That someone was Jesus. He is the gift of grace that God gave to us. When we deserved nothing but "broken and old toys" God gave us the best thing that he had to offer: his only son.

As I raise my boys, I hope and pray that I can instill in them the fact that Christmas isn't about getting what we deserve, it's about receiving the gift of grace from God. Christmas isn't about all the commercialism that is preached at us from Black Friday on, it's the realization that no gift could ever compare to what we receive in and through Christ.

May we come to the realization that the best thing that we can get and give is the news of this gift of grace. May our hearts always be reminded of what we deserve and be thankful of what we receive instead through grace.

Merry Christmas!

Christmas

I listen to a lot of music. That's probably an understatement. Since it's a good part of what I do in my job, you might say that I get paid for listening to music. Of course, it's so much more than that, but I do have to preview music to see whether or not I can appropriately introduce it to our church congregation.

As a kid, my brother and I were forbidden to listen to music that fell outside of the realm of "Christian." Consequently, my brother and I are now complete music "freaks." He has a vinyl record collection that continues to grow daily and I have a CD collection that is ever inching towards the three millenium mark. Both of us have grown to be "music snobs" in some ways and I think that we are comfortable enough to be willing to admit that.

The best musicians that I have encountered are ones who are fairly diverse in their taste. I always enjoy asking people what they listen to and hearing the response, "Anything." I take that as a challenge! Do they like metal? Rap? Hip hop? Classical? I usually find out that "anything" means, "anything but that." I truly listen to a wide array of music: classical, soundtracks, Broadway, folk, rock, folk-rock, classic rock, heavy metal, hip hop, and the list continues.

When I was growing up, music was a big part of who I was. My mom introduced me to the Carpenters who got me through a lot of difficult times in my freshman year of college. I loved listening to the Andrews Sisters sing "Mr. Sandman." Although my mom's collection wasn't vast, it introduced me to some classic music which I still embrace.

As my love for music grew, I was particularly moved every Christmas at the sheer volume of music that was available. Everyone who was anyone had released a Christmas album, which is not to say that they were all good, but they were there nonetheless. Because of the sheer volume of music that was available, it was easy to get sidetracked into some pretty bad releases. Looking at my Christmas music collection, people who know me would not be surprised to find Bob Dylan's Christmas album or the Carpenters Christmas album. But there are some gems in there like Kenny Loggins' "December" and the soundtrack for "The Muppet Christmas Carol."

I pretty much start listening to Christmas music in July or August. It again goes back to the nature of my job in that if I don't get a jump on Christmas during the summer, I'm pretty much going to be "winging it" during the months of Fall. In fact, one of the songs that we are working on for Christmas this year is a song that I discovered a few weeks before Christmas last year. Music is always on my mind and while I love the classics, I am always anxious and interested in hearing something that's new and different.

When my wife and I lived in Asheville, North Carolina, we had friends from Connecticut who had migrated to Charlotte. My wife was finishing her Master's degree in counseling at Gordon-Conwell Seminary in Charlotte, so we would spend a good deal of time in Charlotte for my wife to take classes and for me to spend time with our friends, searching the used CD stores around Charlotte for deals.

As my friend, John, and I were driving one night to the store, he had a CD in his car that we were listening to. Now John is not a singer (sorry, John) but this CD had him wanting to belt out the music. As I waded past my friend's slightly off-key singing, I listened closely to the music and was struck by the sheer musicianship of the artist. John is pretty critical, like me, and I knew that if this was something that he embraced, it might require a second look. So, I asked him who it was and he told me that it was an album called "Behold the Lamb of God" by Andrew Peterson. It was a song cycle about the birth of Christ.

Like me, Peterson is a pastor's kid. So, I feel a connection to him immediately. I went home and ordered the CD. When it arrived, I listened to it from start to finish (unheard of in these days of iPods and MP3 players). After I finished it, I listened to it again, and again, and again. I was captivated by the power of story and how Peterson had weaved the story of Jesus together, incorporating the Old and New Testaments. I'm fairly critical of music (although some would question that as I am a Bob Dylan fan....but whatever!) and beginning to end, this album was superb. The lyrics and melodies were well-crafted, the songs all connected with each other and with me. The album immediately became a staple in my Christmas music collection.

I eventually found out that every year, Peterson tours the country and as Christmas approaches, he plays through the entire song cycle of "Behold the Lamb of God." He also plays at the historic Ryman Auditorium in Nashville with special guests. I purchased a DVD of one of his Ryman concerts and watched in awe with tears coming to my eyes, moved by the sheer power of story, especially the life-altering and world-changing story of Jesus.

Tomorrow night I get the opportunity to experience "Behold the Lamb of God" with some friends. I hope that I have not talked it up too much, but if it has near the impact on them that it has had on me, then I expect nothing less than transformation for the Christmas season for all of them. Aside from the lyrics, music, and incredible talent of all who play and sing, the most important part of this album is that it helps me to remember why I am celebrating Christmas. It's not to get lots of presents, to make sure that my kids get everything they want, or to see some fat guy in a red suit. I celebrate because God saw fit to bring Shalom into my world by offering his son, Jesus, as the greatest gift that anyone could receive. A baby was born, and that baby changed the world. "Behold the Lamb of God" is all about that baby, but more importantly, about how that baby turned everything upside down when he became a man.

As you go into this Christmas season, if you are a lover of music, I would seriously encourage you to check out "Behold the Lamb of God." I would be very surprised if it didn't have an impact on you. After all, it's not necessarily about the music, it's about Jesus!

Here's the link to the album:

https://store.rabbitroom.com/music/behold-the-lamb-of-god-10th-anniversary-2-disc-set