New Beginnings

Life often provides me with experiences that seem hard or near impossible to describe in words.  Of course, not one to accept defeat easily, I somehow manage to push through and find a way to describe what it is that I experienced, but it's a challenge, nonetheless.  It seems that experiences like this have been happening an awful lot lately.

This past Sunday was a new day.  We started a new church.  Not something that happens every day nor something that everyone sets out to accomplish in their lifetime.  It's also not necessarily the best description of what happened on Sunday as the details behind it are far more intricate and detailed than that, but now is not the time nor is this the place to explain the back story that led to it.  The long and short of it is this: God is doing a new thing with people who are ready to stop playing church and start being the church.

I'm not sure what next Sunday will hold, but if this past Sunday was any indication, good things are in store for Church in Restoration.  It's not perfect, it's not complete, but it sure was a pretty good start.  Not sure I've ever heard of a church "plant" that starts out with over 700 people on its first Sunday, but then again, we're not the typical church plant.

The thing of it is, the numbers aren't really important.  What's most important to me and the other leadership is this: that Jesus Christ be lifted high and exalted and that others might know the restoration that He brings to our lives.  If we had 3000 people next week and there was no impact on those who had never experienced the life-changing power of Jesus Christ, then it would be a waste to me.

I left a lucrative career to pursue full-time vocational ministry.  That doesn't make me better than anyone else, I did it because that's what I felt like God was calling me to do.  I did it because I didn't feel like I was making a difference where I was.  I've met plenty of people who were and are making a difference doing the very thing that I left, but it just didn't work for me.  Over the last few years, since my kids were born, I have had a strong desire to let them see and know how important it is to me to make a difference.

I think we're making a difference, but only time will tell.  I'm not taking any of the credit, because it is God that is at work within me.  It's gonna be a wild ride, but I can't wait to see what happens.  If nothing else, we'll at least say that we tried our best to make a difference for Christ.  I'll let you know what happens next week!

A New Beginning

Eight years ago, I began a new direction in my life.  After graduating from Lehigh University in 1995, getting a Master’s degree in Environmental Engineering in 1999, and working in the engineering field for nearly 10 years, I felt God was calling me out of it and into full-time vocational ministry.  On May 30^th, 2004, I was ordained into the ministry at my church in Asheville, North Carolina.

My parents and my brother had made the long trip to Asheville from Connecticut.  My father preached for the service, which was such a privilege for me.  When he was ordained, his uncle, Tucker, whom my second son is named after, preached at the service.  My parents were proud.

Eight years, three kids, two states, and a lost mom later, things look very different than they did that day.  I am approaching the end of my seminary studies and my faith and theology have become even more real to me.  Although I have experienced difficulties and storms, my anchor holds.  While I still maintain my engineering license in Connecticut, there are few days that I really contemplate a change back to things the way that they were.

The big joke with my father when I went off to school at Lehigh was that Jon the Baptist had gone to Bethlehem.  As I told some friends a few weeks ago, it was mildly humorous the first few times, but after exhausting it, as parents are sometimes known to do, it lost its edge.  When my wife and I moved away from Connecticut to North Carolina, we both kept in touch with our families on a regular basis.  I probably talked to my parents on an almost daily basis, always checking in to see how things were going and how they were doing.

Amidst my many phone conversations with my mom, she quoted a verse to me.  Although in my thirties at the time, I was still her baby and I think that I considered some of her doting unnecessary and probably glossed over the verse.  But after hearing it a number of times, I finally asked her what the reference was and she told me Luke 1:14.  It was the words of the angel to Zechariah, John the Baptist’s father.  The angel said, “He will be a joy and delight to you, and many will rejoice because of his birth.”  Shortly after I had inquired as to the verse, my mom gave me a small frame for my desk.  She was gifted in calligraphy and she had written up a verse. 

That framed verse still sits on my desk at the church.  It’s a constant reminder to me of all of this.  It’s a reminder to me of where I have come from, the journey that has brought me to the place where I am today.  It’s a reminder of what’s been left behind.  But more importantly, it’s a reminder to me of what’s ahead.  My mom was always proud of me and she never hesitated to tell me that.  She would mention it often enough that it was hard for me to forget it.  In many ways, the verse is a reminder to me of her as well.

But the verse also stands as a challenge to me.  I am not perfect, I make many mistakes, but this verse is a reminder to me of my calling, of my responsibility to the people that I come in contact with.  I hope and pray that people can say that I have been a joy and a delight to them, I know that my parents can and could.  The words of the verse are strong though, many will rejoice because of his birth.  I can think of a few people who probably wish that I had never been born, but I can think of many more who have encouraged me with kind words, thoughtful notes, and incredible gifts who I would like to think have been blessed by what God has offered through me.  Everyone’s got their haters, and I am no exception, but I also know that there are many people who are thankful that God has brought me into their life.

Once in a while, when I’m feeling full of myself, I’ll tell someone that everyone needs some Jon Gibson in their life.  While I’m usually saying it “tongue and cheek,” I hope and pray that what I can offer to people is something that will change them for the better, not because of who I am, but because of what God has done in me and through me.

My constant prayer is that God can use me to be a joy and a delight, not only to my parents, but to anyone who God puts in my path.  I pray that many will rejoice because of my birth, not because I am so wonderful, but because I serve a wonderful God who uses simple people to accomplish His will.  The words from Isaiah 61 that my mom had on her nightstand when she died are appropriate here.  Verse 3 ends with these words, “They will be called oaks of righteousness, a planting of the Lord for the display of his splendor.”  That is my prayer, may God use me to be just that.  Amen.

Arrogance vs. Confidence

There's a thin line between confidence and arrogance. Many people walk the line, others don't even come close. Confidence is a good thing, generally. I can't think of any time when arrogance is good. Leaders need confidence, not arrogance. Sometimes, confidence is interpreted by some as arrogance. How do we distinguish the two?

I have seen this played out in people all of my life. There are those who carry themselves with a strict confidence, fully aware of their own gifting and not afraid to let others know that they possess it. There are also those who think that they possess something more than they do and act like allowing you into their world should be considered a privilege. I guess it borders on entitlement, but what causes it?

I can think of three places where I have encountered the arrogance: music stores, educational institutions, and churches. I remember going to a chain of music stores when I lived in Connecticut. I remember walking in and seeing tons of people working, none of whom was willing to give me the time of day. As I observed the situation, I realized that any time that someone would approach me, there was an attitude there. It said, "I'm doing you a favor, so be grateful and don't waste my time." The other thing it said was, "I really don't want to be here, but I can't make enough money doing what I love to do, so here I am."

I remember an engineering professor that I had whose arrogance oozed like an infected sore. He acted as if you were privileged to be under his teaching. I can think of some names that I had for him at the time, none of which are appropriate. I pointed out an error he had made on the board during a class and he glossed over me, like I wasn't worth his time, until a teaching assistant pointed out that I was correct. Did I get an apology? Do pigs fly?

I guess the place where I have seen this arrogance that makes the least sense to me is within the church. As followers of Christ, we are to look to him as our example. Every day, we should see less of us and more of him, we shouldn't be too familiar, otherwise, we haven't been transformed. How is it that people who claim to be proclaiming the message of Jesus could be so arrogant?

Thankfully, I have not had to face too much of this firsthand in recent years. I have had the privilege of working with people who understand that humility makes us look more like Christ, even if we come across as weak in the world's eyes. They understand that they are instruments and vessels, used by God for his glory, not their own. They understand that if they don't submit themselves to be used, God will find some other person and way to accomplish what he intends on accomplishing.

When I went into full-time vocational ministry seven years ago, I did so with no small amount of pondering. I had been trained as an engineer, receiving a bachelor's and master's degree in engineering. I was licensed and working as a senior engineer in a nationally recognized engineering firm. I was fairly successful from the vantage point of the people around me. In the 10 years that I had practiced engineering, I had doubled my salary and I was continuing my way up the ladder of success. But I wasn't very happy and fulfilled. Something was missing.

I didn't take the decision to pursue ministry as a calling and a profession lightly. I am the son of a pastor and I knew the drawbacks that came with the territory. I knew that if I didn't pursue this calling, my life would be miserable. Seven years into the decision, I don't regret the decision, but I do often wonder whether I am supposed to be doing what I am doing exactly as I am doing it. I'm not questioning my calling, I'm questioning how I am going about that calling.

I avoided seminary for fear of becoming an arrogant jerk who thought that he knew everything that there was to know about God, the Bible, and Christianity. When I finally went, I was blessed to find a program set up exactly for me and people who were in the same place that I was in. As I near completion, I think that I can honestly say that I have not become that arrogant jerk that I so feared becoming and I haven't really met too many others like that either.

But, I entered ministry through the "back door." There were lots of people who went from Christian college, to Bible school, to seminary, to a church as a pastor, who had no clue what it was like to do anything else. The Christian bubble that they had surrounded themselves with had created an arrogance within them. They were not only unable to relate to people who had no belief in God, they could barely relate to people who considered themselves Christians.

I'm at a place in my life where I'm tired of those kinds of people. I have no space for people who want to "play church." If you want to play church, do everyone a favor and set it up in a place where you will have little impact on anyone other than people who think, act, and look just like you do. The world doesn't need another church full of arrogant, self-righteous people who think that salvation means a "Get out of Hell Free" card instead of a life of abundance (not abundance of material things but the abundance that Christ spoke of) through Christ.

Christ called disciples, not Pharisees. Last time I checked, we were still incapable of saving ourselves. That's why we need a savior, that's why we need Jesus. Arrogance comes from a place where we legitimately think we are capable of doing this all on our own. Confidence comes from a place where we know that we can do all things through Christ, working in us and through us.

I don't know what the future holds for me. 2011 has been a tumultuous year for me and I am simply living moment by moment, day by day, in the grace that God gives me. There are some who fear that as soon as my seminary education is finished that I am moving on from where I am. That's not my plan. That's doesn't mean that it can't happen, but there are too many unknowns for me to make that kind of judgment call right now.

I do know that as I read more and more and grow closer to God through my walk with Christ, I begin to see things that I can't ignore. I see that the call to be a disciple is an uncompromising, unflinching, unbending pursuit of God's kingdom. Sometimes that pursuit requires a price. Often that price is high. It's always uncomfortable. To diminish this is to diminish the example that Christ set forth for us. Sometimes, I push forward, feeling as if I am the only one moving in a certain direction. The challenge is to distinguish if that's because I'm wrong or because where I am going is hard. After all, I've heard it said that if you are a leader and your are leading, if you turn around and find that no one is following, you're just taking a walk.

Jesus never promised wealth and fame for those who followed him. He did promise that he would provide for them, that he would give them what they needed, and that he would never leave them or forsake them. Do we really need much more than that? If I have confidence, it's because of this. If it appears as arrogant, so be it. My confidence is not in myself, it's in the One who created me and who has equipped me with every good thing to do his will.

I'm in this for the long haul. The time to act is now, the time to be a disciple is here. So, here we go. I once saw a bumper sticker that said, "Jesus is coming back...look busy." But I say, Jesus is coming back, get busy. Who's with me, other than the goldfish (apologies Jerry Maguire)?